Olympic Medals Britain Could Actually Win
Just came up with this, in conversation with a friend, after noting that the US have won 23 gold and 65 total, with the UK in 9th with 7 gold and 22 total (Germany is in 6th with 8 gold and 29 total).

Medals we could win easily:

  • Competitive Queuing
  • Hating the French
  • Discussing the Weather
  • Planning Travel Routes
  • Bemoaning the Cod Quota
  • Writing Letters To The Editor
  • The Decline of Schools
  • The Decline of the British Empire
  • Nothing Is As Good As It Used To Be
  • Stubbornly Refusing To Learn Foreign Languages
  • Being Indignant About Just About Everything
  • Lurid Newspaper Headline Writing
  • Performing Major Road Repairs During Rush Hour
  • How Not to Run the Railways
  • Privatisation for Fun and Profit
  • The Art Of Unwrapping, Running Under the Cold Tap, And Re-Wrapping A Sandwich Thus Keeping It Sellable For A Good Week And A Half (Sponsored by British Rail)
  • Eliminating Whole Industries At A Stroke
  • Bad Industrial Relations

And of course, drumroll please.....:

  • Preparing For Emergencies!

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